Don't cling to power, it's not that powerful

Empowerment

I look at the word.

Tick.

Definitely.

I believe in it.

I do it.

?

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I’m feeling a prickle on the back of my neck.

My fingers starting to twitch.

I’m starting to focus on the words I want to say, no longer listening to what the person is saying.

Inside I’m huffing.

Why did they do it that way?

Why?

All that wasted time and effort has not got us to where we need to be.

If they’d just picked up on my hints as to how they could have done it...

“Why…?”

Those are the words that tumble out of my mouth.

The person stops talking.

Their eyes widen.

They drop their gaze.

It gets uncomfortable.

They head off having agreed that earlier my hints were and still are helpful.

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We’re all together in a meeting. We have a number of problems we’re trying to sort out. I’m acutely aware that the problems me and my team are facing are causing significant delays and pressure is mounting to get them sorted out quickly.

I’m asking my team for ideas, what we could do next. We’ve already tried a number of options to no avail. I’m trying to hide the pressure I’m under, not let it seep through and affect them.

But they are looking at me.

And I don’t have answers.

Many sleepless nights follow.

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Months later and I’m reflecting in a performance review.

The questions I’m being asked are making me fidget in my seat.

‘What could you have done differently, to sort that out quicker?’

‘How will you deal with something like that next time?’

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I’m holding my breath.

I sit on my hands.

Then I realise my shoulders are hunched, so I put my hands in my lap and try to drop my shoulders down.

I can feel the words bubbling up “why don’t you just…”

But I stop them.

A couple of members of my team are discussing options to sort out something that’s no longer working as expected.

They come up with a plan.

I hold back my temptation.

Instead I ask them how long it’s going to take, what they need.

We agree to meet to review progress.

We’re discussing how things are going. They’ve not solved the problem. Instead they’ve uncovered something else.

A stab of frustration runs through me.

More problems.

I take a deep breath to steady myself.

But their pointing out that what they’ve uncovered has much wider implications.

Oh!

We talk through the next steps.

Another plan.

I leave them to it.

We get together to examine what they discover, discuss the implications and next steps. I talk with colleagues about what my team has found and potential implications. As the picture builds, my team are able to adapt and adjust to overcome both the original problem and the one that was hidden. They share what they’ve learnt with colleagues, and they too are able to adapt their work.

And my team get recognition and reward for what theyaccomplished.

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I’m looking at that word again.

Empowerment.

A positive word, but one about the things I had to stop doing.

Controlling other people’s way of working

Believing I had the answers

Believing I knew best

Hearing but not listening to their ideas

Offering supportive words but not giving freedom or accountability

I’ve realised that it’s hard to step back and trust others, especially when I’m feeling vulnerable. Yet the impact of having done so is greater than what I could have done alone.