I’m staring at it.
My never ending to do list.
And write at this moment I’m forcing myself to do number 10
on that list.
And that’s to write this blog post.
Yes, it’s been a while.
Well actually it’s been months.
And that means it’s been months where that little voice
inside has been telling me “you’ve not done your blog post yet”
And that nagging gnawing feeling has grown.
Finally I’ve had some headspace and so here it is. My (what
feels like) long over-due blog post, the first for this year.
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Why did I stop blogging?
Very simply, I finally followed what I’d been sharing with
you…
Towards the end of last year I was talking about kindness,
what that means and the importance of being kind to ourselves as well as
others.
It wasn’t easy though.
Truly grateful to have work, I just kept going until a
combination of things made me realise that I was running on empty.
I couldn’t keep all the plates spinning, I had to let some
go.
And that was hard.
Prioritising could no longer just about pieces of work to complete,
it was about prioritising all that I was anxiously trying to squeeze into my
waking hours and was spilling over into what should have been my sleeping hours
too.
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Eventually I let some things go.
I gave myself a bit of space.
I focused on what I saw as the most vital and critical
things, including making some ‘protected’ down time for myself.
I had to re-learn how to relax, to find pleasure in small or
unexpected things. To get away from telling myself “this is good for you and
your wellbeing” to genuinely enjoying something.
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I’m sharing these thoughts and they’ve prompted me to think
about what I’m taking with me from the last few months. And I hope there’s
something here that might also help you too.
1. Being grateful, generous and not holding guilt
Gratitude for good fortune
(whether by luck, self-made or both) is important. It’s also not a stick to
beat ourselves with, but is something hold and acknowledge that others may not
be so fortunate. When we’re in a good place, then we’re in a place where we can
help others and share some of our good fortune.
2. Looking after the whole of ourselves
If overwhelming circumstances
lead to trying to control and maintain every little thing, to the point that
even relaxation time becomes something-to-do on your task list, take a deep
breath and pause. How can you change from “I need to…” to “I want to…”?
3. Relaxation can take work
It’s not that relaxation should
be work, it’s more that what feels relaxing might take some conscious energy
and thought “is this really helping me unwind, or am I getting stressed about
trying to fit it in?”
Awareness of when things have
stopped being relaxing and have slipped into becoming a task to complete.
Lockdown has made me reassess and adjust what I think of as ‘down-time’ or
relaxation. And that’s not been a bad thing, it just took a while to realise
some things I once enjoyed and helped me unwind we no longer do that and it was
time to find something that did.
So how about you? What have you
discovered over the last few months that you’ll keep doing? What changes have
you made recently that will remain with you?
The last year has been an almost
unimaginable test of our resilience through incredibly difficult and emotional
times. And we’ve been forced to adapt. Quickly.
Looking ahead, whilst there is a
road that’s visible, it’s hard to see the direction it’s taking us and
unexpected twists and turns feel almost inevitable. So I’m gathering what I’ve
learnt to help me on the journey.
What will you be taking to help
you?
